Towards equality

On November 20, Governor Quinn signed into law the bill that will bring marriage equality to Illinois. On June 1, 2014, three years after our civil union, eight years after our commitment ceremony, and fifteen years into our relationship, Marilyn and I will be able to apply for a marriage license as a same-sex couple. We will finally be treated as equals in our own state.  And the federal government will recognize our marriage, too.

I feel a range of emotions when I think of this progress: relief and joy that we have come this far; anger that the struggle existed at all, that my fellow citizens took this long to decide we are worthy; and sadness for those who died before this new law, leaving behind survivors who were never recognized as family by the state, and therefore will never receive the financial benefits.

Overall, though, November was a month to celebrate progress towards equality.  Below is a series of photos that chronicles the celebration.

On Tuesday, November 5, Marilyn and I followed the Illinois House debate online, looking for updates.  That afternoon, I was getting ready to grade papers and had just ordered a decaf Americano at the neighborhood coffee shop when this text from Marilyn came through: my first--and I hope, only, proposal of marriage.  It was all so exciting, I wanted to tell someone.  But I wasn't sure of the barista's views, so I didn't say anything while still at the counter.  In minutes, though, I was online, sharing the joy with friends.

This graphic was all over Facebook, and soon it was my profile photo.

Marilyn had said that morning, "If the bill passes, we have to have wedding cake."  That evening, she went to the bakery that had designed our commitment ceremony cake, a towering affair, and got this "wedding white" cake.  The proprietor, who recognized Marilyn, offered to write on it.  When I posted this photo on Facebook, we received dozens of messages of congratulations.

This was the front page of our local paper the next morning. It's striking how a newspaper headline can make progress seem more real.  

The Unitarian Universalist (UU) church we belong to had a celebration that weekend.  I took these cookies--quartered because they were so large--to the rainbow-themed potluck at the church.  

This was the cake made by the organizers of the celebration, who are among those who have lobbied for equal rights for gays and lesbians.  We feel so fortunate to belong to a church that works proactively for justice and equality.

When the newspaper did a story on the local response, our minister was interviewed and was on the front page.

The altar decorations that Sunday celebrated the marriage equality victory.  This is the sanctuary where we had our commitment ceremony in 2006.

Those are candles of joy and concern, lit silently during the service.  One of the few spoken joys submitted that day was about the bill being passed.

It's official.  And still a little amazing.